For some strange reason, the internet seems to be obsessed with running the 1993 classic shooter DOOM on everything with a display or chip inside. This begs the question: is there anything that can’t run DOOM?
The NES
Nintendon’t run DOOM
The Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) is a legendary video game console that was originally released in 1983, ten years before DOOM. Considering the fact that today’s decade-old consoles and PCs can run many newly released games, it might seem plausible at first that the NES could run DOOM.
However, the hardware simply isn’t powerful enough to run it natively. DOOM‘s minimum system requirements demand 4MB of RAM, an Intel i386 (80386) 32-bit CPU from 1985, and a VGA GPU. Compare that to the NES’s mere 2KB of RAM, a weak 8-bit CPU, and a PPU in place of a VGA.
Despite these challenges, there is technically a way to make the NES display (as opposed to run) DOOM. YouTuber TheRasteri managed to do it with the help of a Raspberry Pi (a modern mini-PC that you can use to emulate an NES/SNES) inserted into an NES cartridge:
As the YouTuber points out, this shouldn’t be considered cheating, as a similar trick was used to run 2D and 3D graphics with the help of a Super FX coprocessor on some SNES cartridges.
While I don’t want to downplay the achievement and can truly appreciate the trick, my counterargument is that DOOM isn’t actually running on the NES, it’s simply being used as an intermediary output device. In this case, the NES is functioning more like a cable than a console. Personally, I find real 3D raycaster games on the NES, like Horror Hospital, more impressive, as it’s actually running on Nintendo’s hardware.
Pregnancy tests
Congratulations! It’s a Doomguy!
One of the funniest and most clickable “run DOOM on X” topics in recent years was when programmer Foone Turing managed to run DOOM on a pregnancy test. The jokes about teaching them young, gaming in the womb, or the unborn baby being your average online teammate practically wrote themselves.
Unfortunately, as impressive as this is, the pregnancy test doesn’t actually run DOOM. In fact, if we were to compare it to the NES from above, you could say that it runs DOOM even less than that.
Rather than using the pregnancy test’s hard-coded chip or its LCD (which can only display the results of a pregnancy test), Turing gutted the device, replacing the CPU with an Adafruit board and the LCD with a different display. The pregnancy test is essentially being used as a non-functional mini-computer case.
That said, given how rapidly technology advances, I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw real pregnancy tests capable of running DOOM natively. Weak chips and limited LCDs might no longer exist twenty years from today as mass-produced technology continues to evolve.
Casio calculator watch
We need an upgraded version for DOOM
Modern calculators are powerful. There are several videos online of people running DOOM natively on various calculators, with one of the most popular examples being the Casio FX-CG50. It’s not all that surprising, though—the calculator is capable of rendering 3D graphs and features a surprisingly sharp color LCD. It’s a legitimate handheld PC.
The fact that DOOM can run on modern smartwatches is especially not surprising. They’re practically wristwatch gaming powerhouses capable of running a whole list of games.
However, the famous Casio Calculator Watch (worn by Breaking Bad‘s Walter White and The Office‘s Dwight Schrute) is neither of these things. Its hardware and display aren’t capable of running and displaying a working version of DOOM, at least, from what I can gather. I couldn’t find anyone running it. That said, considering the fact that DOOM can run in a PDF file, I wouldn’t be surprised if somebody eventually figured it out.
TI-99/4A Home Computer
Apologies to those who are still using a TI-99/4A
It’s reasonable to expect that some home computers from the ’80s would be capable of running DOOM—and some of them are. Well, sort of. Take this upgraded Commodore 64 as an example—while it can technically run DOOM, it does so at a rather low resolution and frame rate.
However, the Texas Instruments TI-99/4A, which was released around the same time as the Commodore 64, can’t even manage that. While it can perform some extremely basic raycasting, it’s far from enough to run DOOM. Coincidentally, there’s a popular game made for the TI-99/4A from its era called Tunnels of Doom.
Neo Geo
Go back to Metal Slug, I guess
Of all the devices on this list, I find that Neo Geo not being able to run DOOM the most surprising. In case you haven’t heard of it, the Neo Geo was an expensive home video game console made by the SNK Corporation. It promised to bring arcade games to your living room.
The Neo Geo was released in 1990, just three years before DOOM. Given how efficiently DOOM‘s code is optimized (which allows it to run on almost anything), it’s surprising that the Neo Geo can’t handle it.
While 2D games built for the Neo Geo ran exceptionally well, the problem is that Neo Geo’s architecture was never built for 3D games. As explained in a Reddit comment, the Neo Geo has no bitmap graphics mode, which is needed for displaying 3D games like DOOM. Instead, it relies on sprites (predefined images) to efficiently display 2D games.
Bacteria
Everybody’s favorite computer, the humble germ
This entry requires some context. An MIT biotechnology PhD student researcher by the name of Lauren ‘Ren’ Ramlan created a 32×48 1-bit screen by placing illuminated E. coli into an array, effectively using the bacteria to work as pixels. She then downscaled DOOM to that resolution and ran it on the E. coli-based screen. This is an extremely impressive achievement that sets a precedent for how biotechnology could be integrated into future display technologies.
However, displaying DOOM isn’t the same as running DOOM. The bacteria is simply being used as a super low-resolution display, so just like how it can be used to display DOOM, it could technically display any other piece of content.
Given that the display takes over 9 hours to show a single frame, finishing the game would take over 600 years. Making a small mistake or dying means you’d have to add an entire new generation to complete the game!
There’s never enough DOOM
While nearly any device with a screen and processor can run DOOM (the game can even be simulated using AI), this list highlights a few surprising devices that humanity has yet to conquer.
Still, I truly appreciate the creativity and effort behind all of these projects, and I can’t wait to see which device will run DOOM next.
Stephan is the sports journalist for the Maple Grove Report.
